Subscribe to all of my blatherings right in your wob brewser!Subscribe to my latest blatherings right in your wob brewser! Pnårp in print! Made from 35% recycled toilet paper! Send Pnårp your garrulous praise… or excretory condemnation! The less you tweet? The more you toot! Dreaming widely about my page! Tweet! Tweet! Twat! Livin’ it up… on a living journal! A whole book full of my faces? A whole book full of my faces?
You’re my favorite visitor!

Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page

Entries mentioning soup

There are no bagels here

Landed on November 10, 2024

By the bag, the can, the bottle, and the flask

Trashed on September 29, 2024

How does blue cheese go bad?

Reposed on September 1, 2024

A nipple that could nibble

Nuzzled on August 25, 2024

Endless rows of houses

Planned and zoned on August 11, 2024

Purple prose asphyxia

Blockaded on May 26, 2024

One moron’s opinion

Opined for May 19, 2024

Never put a fish in your car

Wrapped on May 12, 2024

Nose, the best smelling device

Stunk down on April 28, 2024

So many questions

Trebled on April 21, 2024

A vernally hibernal good time

Drove on March 24, 2024

There’s a joke in here somewhere

Pedicured on March 17, 2024

The case of the windy toilet

Manicured on March 10, 2024

Pig-headed and ham-fisted

Cleaved on March 3, 2024

Angry monkey syndrome, a dishdirtier

Illustrated on February 4, 2024

Watering the water clocks

Watered on January 28, 2024

Shaken and stir crazy

Swept on January 21, 2024

My life as a computer

Computed on January 14, 2024

The splaying of resplendent splendiferousness

Cobbled together on December 31, 2023

Musings on the salad of chicken and eggs

Emulsified on November 5, 2023

Mulberries, mulbiaries, mubbleducks, and mubbliaries

Trussed up on October 29, 2023

An oversized capybara, a staccato cadence

Hobbled on October 22, 2023

A real nobody

Fettered on October 15, 2023

For want of a letterbox

Shackled on October 1, 2023

The Aroostook Roo Store

Rued the day of September 17, 2023

By fish or by Finn

Finished after September 10, 2023

Corn gone bacon and eggs

Consterned on September 3, 2023

Ratiocination and a rat

Bugged off on July 9, 2023

Gearless largesse and rageless eelgrass

Snorkeled on June 11, 2023

It doesn’t have to—but I always do

Needn’t on June 4, 2023

A monolithic dump

Pumped and dumped on April 30, 2023

Being a little bit taller

Racked on April 16, 2023

Being six feet tall

Fathomed on April 9, 2023

The day ended before it began

Endorsed on March 19, 2023

To be a featureless white worm

Gouged out on March 12, 2023

Landing head-first in March

Made it on March 5, 2023

To catch a fly

Lashed on February 26, 2023

A mystery of hasps and coat hangers

Fastened on January 29, 2023

No more barriers to cross

Surpassed on January 15, 2023

Feeling rather non-Euclidean

Knotted on January 8, 2023

I am my thoughts… I am time

Annuated on January 1, 2023

A real galleyshnogger of a Christmas

Dove in on December 25, 2022

We were bipedal murder chickens

Corned on December 11, 2022

Thanksgiving with the McBorbleys

Thanks given on November 27, 2022

A draught horse, serendipity, and a bankruptcy

Forstraught on October 30, 2022

Autumn had arrived

Floundered on October 16, 2022

The deep toaster

Smeared on October 9, 2022

And then the flies danced

Smelt on October 2, 2022

Yet still bereft of meaning

Creamed on September 25, 2022

A veritable trash dump of words

Whipped on September 18, 2022

“If” is the middle word in “life”

Horrified on September 11, 2022

History looked at me this week

Transported on September 4, 2022

On any given day

Plotted and schemed on August 21, 2022

Wernicke, Broca, and a two-week, drug-fueled bender

Refueled on June 19, 2022

Flogging the dinosaur

Flailed around on May 1, 2022

An exaggeratedly long week

Galloped about on April 17, 2022

A curious nine-day week

Dialed on April 3, 2022

The stars screamed at me, but why?

Shredded on March 6, 2022

Interwoven threads of witless boobery

Spiked on February 20, 2022

Three-eyed gnomes, a lighthouse, and a pair of feet

Erred on February 13, 2022

Nothing happened

Obliviated on January 9, 2022

New years and new neighbors

Bunted on January 2, 2022

Vigorously shaking every ficus tree

Shook before December 12, 2021

An adventure in Dingleberry–Dumpsterism

Dumped and stirred on November 28, 2021

The Dingleberry–Hampsterist–Schmarnocks war

Embattled on November 21, 2021

An out-of-place trashcan

Recycled on November 14, 2021

A Halloween to surely forget

Spooked before November 7, 2021

To muffle up a gooſe

Muffled up on October 31, 2021

A Sefernday to ſurely remember

Obſerved on October 24, 2021

Plantago delenda est

Planted on October 17, 2021

Dugong, budong, hotdog, and hoe

Frowned at on October 3, 2021

The pink, sticky day ended

Chaptered and versed on September 12, 2021

Wearing orange after Labor Day

Fluoresced on September 5, 2021

To not be a six-foot-tall man–squirrel

Squeeorled on August 15, 2021

Today I was being a…

Squirreled on August 8, 2021

Fish upon the land

Phished on July 18, 2021

An Independence Day to remember

In the pants on July 4, 2021

Another day, another pig war

Splined on June 20, 2021

Great Dane or greatest Dane?

Deigned on May 23, 2021

A dire problem of diphthongs and diacritics

Ired on May 16, 2021

Keeping those goats down in the hole

Bored on April 18, 2021

From Commodus to Vespasian—

Detruded on April 11, 2021

A costly, costive dilemma

Clystered on April 4, 2021

Christmas, goats, and the fiscal cliff

Goat got on December 30, 2012

Mooey, mooey, moo!

Lowed at on December 9, 2012

Horses, drugs, and some Volvos

Revolved around December 2, 2012

The geese were angry

Angered before November 4, 2012

Ziti—with lines, please

Lollygagged on October 28, 2012

The nauga war

Tanned on October 14, 2012

Meals and utensils and straws, oh my!

Bluely rinsed on October 7, 2012

In my own back yard

Extirpated on September 30, 2012

A hortensical Sefernday

Hortensed on July 1, 2012

My neighbor—he’s on fire

Detonated on May 27, 2012

The green apple bee-bop

Hydrated on May 20, 2012

Surviving April Fools Day

Foxholed on April 1, 2012

A Ho-Mg-Zn icosahedral quasicrystal

Fractured on February 12, 2012

And then the cold cuts danced

Ronpauled on January 15, 2012

This entry is missing!

Misplaced before January 8, 2012

A trip to southern Moravia

Plunged off a cliff on November 27, 2011

Grunting and squeaking in the goatburping park

Soil sampled on November 13, 2011

Squee! Squee! Squee!

Snoozed on October 9, 2011

A snootful of donuts

Imbibed before October 2, 2011

The toadskin kazoo

Toads skinned on September 4, 2011

The day ended

Gibbered about on August 7, 2011

Just so he could moo at someone

Percolated on July 3, 2011

The end of doodlewhacker pie

Bloomed on June 26, 2011

Moobly Sefernday!

Borndwiddied on June 19, 2011

What the heck… is bothering me?

Chanted on June 12, 2011

Incipits being rather popish

Lubricated on May 22, 2011

Hnnnngggghhhh!

Strained on May 1, 2011

Plårp and I did our best

Potted on April 10, 2011

A dark and Strommy night

Thurmonned on February 27, 2011

A dark and smarmy night

Self-satisfied on February 13, 2011

A dark and stormy night

Stormdrained on February 6, 2011

Back to Pam & Meg’s

Goatmulched on December 12, 2010

375 gorillas and some flower pots

Dumbstruck on November 28, 2010

Mr. Årp goes to city hall

Carpetbagged on November 14, 2010

Ah, the first of August!

Firstly on August 1, 2010

Psycho Chicken With Fingers On Top!

Squawked upon prior to June 13, 2010

The fleeting nuances of Dingleberry–Hampsterism

Guzzled on May 9, 2010

A plan is hatched

Hatched right before April 4, 2010

Ham by the brick

Mechanically extracted on March 28, 2010

Dingleberry champion hamster

Plotted against on March 21, 2010

Suddenly ablaze

Ignited on March 9, 2008

Today is January 27

Punched on January 27, 2008

Free at last

Self-addressed and stamped on December 2, 2007

Aaaahhhh!!

Whiffled on November 25, 2007

The one true goddess!

Duffeled on November 18, 2007

There’s nothing in my head!

Scuffled with on November 11, 2007

Snuffle off to Buffalo

Sniffled at on November 4, 2007

Strahazazhia smiles upon me

Gone wrong on October 28, 2007

The deep blue face of failure

Done wrong on October 21, 2007

Graceful as Loquisha’s soles

Danced with on October 14, 2007

Under Pam & Meg’s

Delved under on September 9, 2007

Grumfeld redux

Simmered on September 2, 2007

Paisley time

Enslaved on June 17, 2007

Sleeping in the closet

Lamented on April 22, 2007

The laws of Phillip I: Last decree

Decreed on April 15, 2007

The laws of Phillip I: Homage

Legislated on April 8, 2007

The laws of Phillip I: Taxes

Propagated on April 1, 2007

The laws of Phillip I

Promulgated on March 25, 2007

The restive provinces conquered

Excoriated before March 18, 2007

Eight years

Anniversed four days before March 11, 2007

131,072 Schmongeloid conscripts

Decimated on March 4, 2007

No one expects the Schmalkaldic League

Vanquished on February 25, 2007

Digging up the back yard

Cashed in on February 18, 2007

Fort Flabberwocky was a myth!

Auld acquaintances forgotten on December 31, 2006

The Great Fluffernutter Deluge of ’58

Whored out on December 10, 2006

Haldûrburðgar, Lord and Emperor

Knifed with a spoon on September 10, 2006

Pam & Meg’s

Wheeled about on April 23, 2006

368,000 firecrackers and a butcher shop

Tarpapered over on January 1, 2006

Stewing in my own juices

Brewed on November 13, 2005

Caught in a wet noodling contest

Noodled on October 16, 2005

Spruce mustard and bouillabaisse

Trundled on August 28, 2005

The Trooble Foundation

Irked on April 17, 2005

Contemplating the Spice Girls

Best if sold by February 27, 2005